I want the perfect family, the perfect man to sweep me off my feet, I want to travel the world, and live in foreign countries. I want to not only tell everyone about Christ, but for them to feel his love, and choose Heaven. I want a perfect world.
In fact, I crave perfect love.
As I watch the sun drift away to the other parts of the earth, no longer visible to my little world. The phrase "its the little things" comes to mind. But musing deeper the thought comes: why am I supposed to be happy when I have had a good day, and everything is going well. But I'm not supposed to be happy when I miss out on the "little things" and my focus is the reality that no-one can really always be there and love perfectly, that I will always desire more from people than is humanly possible.
When I look at life and realize, friendships grow apart, we are all wounded and hurting, and the effects of sin are devastating. I know I can't have joy with this reality.
Unless, this is not really how I need to see reality at all.
I have to refocus, to realize, my dream is but a thought in a much larger book, my name is just one of the millions. This book I speak of is The Book of Life. The author is Jesus Christ, and he loves me unconditionally and perfectly.
I have a purpose because I'm not living life to be happy, I'm not living for myself. I live for Christ. I will always fail on my own but it's not about trying to stand on my own. I don't want to be alone, I want joy from a relationship with someone who loves me perfectly, and holds me fast.
Despite the heaviness of the reality of my sin, I have joy unspeakable because Christ has already saved my soul. One day I'm going to heaven. Did I mention heaven is perfect?
With Christ, I am getting everything I want. perfect love, and a promise that God is working everything for my good.
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